Do you believe in soulmates?

It’s been awhiiile since the last time I wrote something here. I’ve been gone for more than a month and so many things have already happened here, I hope I can catch up with the people I follow and all that. Anywayyy…

After a year of staying on an apartment, my housemates decided that we could no longer afford it, so we transferred, this time, in a dormitory for ladies. The dorm’s owner also stays at home with her family, and they rent bed spaces for us students in their extra rooms. Earlier today, I woke up a bit later than usual and had my brunch at the dining area. Tita, as we all bedspacers fondly call her, accompanied me and the next thing I know, she was already sharing her love story.

In her younger days, tita had many suitors and had many boyfriends (One at a time of course). All of them were  goodlooking and were really nice. She told me how she became famous in high school because her boyfriend was almost every girl’s dream. That was his first boyfriend, and even though they didn’t end up together, they were still friends until now. Then, when she was around 20 or 21 years old, there was this guy from the army—a lieutenant. He was very goodlooking (more goodlooking than any of her past boyfriends) and everyone in the workplace (she worked in an army hospital I think, I’m not sure) was almost drooling over the guy. The reason was that, he wasn’t just the tall, dark and handsome type. He was also sweet, caring and very nice. Everyone liked him. He courted tita for more than six months already and it was very obvious that he loved her very much. Everyone was envious of her, and wherever they go together, people always looked at them, maybe because they were both tall and looked good together. She told me how sometimes, she feels a bit conscious because she couldn’t really know what they were thinking. Maybe their thoughts were, “He’s so good looking, how could he end up liking someone like her?”

She liked him and was beginning to fall for him, around this time, she was already thinking about saying yes to him but something was keeping her from doing it. It was as if she was still doubtful. And she didn’t trust guys with a face like his. Guys with that face are players. Everyone was frustrated with her, how could she be doubtful with someone like that? If she didn’t want him, they were all willing to take her place, or leave their husbands behind for him, LOL.

Then one day, there was this guy who got confined in the area and a friend of hers asked her to accompany her as he visits this friend of his. This guy was a cadet who went to a very prestigious school who trains people for the army and had an accident while he was there. He was just lying in his bed, while she on the other hand was irritated to have to be there and wasn’t looking directly at the guy though she could sense him looking at her from time to time, which irritated her more. Later that day, when she resumed her work (she works in the logistics area where the guy was confined), the guy visited her and stayed there sitting stiffly (as was the custom for guys in the army, so stiff this people are when they stand or sit down, lol) while she finished her work. She didn’t mind him, thinking he wants to ask her to accompany him around the place (because his friend told her to accommodate him while he was still there). The other soldiers in the room were smiling wickedly. I swear boys have this telepathic thing going on, lol.

She was shocked when after finishing her work, the guy didn’t ask to be accompanied around the area, he asked her out instead (like dinner and all those things). After three days, they were a couple. (WHAT!!! *insert shock face here* )

She told me that it may seem very fast but at that time, it was as if she knew the guy before already and she was very comfortable with him, as if they’ve known each other for years and not just for a few days. Everyone was like, “YOU DID WHAT?!” They were all rooting for the lieutenant and everyone was curious. Why did she just choose someone she just met (THREE DAYS, FOR GOD’S SAKE!) over a guy who has proven his feelings for her—and was hot, an officer, nice, intelligent blablabla.

She told me how it seemed that they fit. For the guy, it was love at first sight. One look at her, and something clicked. For her, it happened when they spent some time together. (The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks, anyone?) She knew by the third day that she was in love. People still find it odd, how a newcomer could just win her over that easily and the other soldiers joke around how fast and slick he was to have won her over.

Their boss told the soldiers to let them be and be happy for them. It wasn’t very often that people find their “soulmates” and they were lucky to have found each other so easily. Yes, this came from one of the bosses from the army (didn’t know they have this romantic side, lol.). Everyone was still doubtful, would they really end up together after just meeting for a few days?

They did. They’ve been together for more than 20 years now and have 3 children already. 🙂

But… what happened to the lieutenant after learning about them being a couple?! 😦

Apparently, by the fifth day, the lieutenant paid her a visit, and wanted answers. Why so fast? He knew that she was falling for him and that anytime soon, she would have said yes to him if tito (as we fondly call him now) didn’t barge in. She didn’t know what to say. Only that, it was as if she was looking for something and couldn’t find it in him, he didn’t lack anything—in fact, he had everyting and was really ideal. But it just didn’t feel right, didn’t click. And the lieutenant couldn’t help it. He cried, in front of her. He was that hurt.

I felt sooo bad for him. I really did. 😥

Why is it that we always look for an ideal guy and when we find one that is closest to that image, they end up not being right? Whyyy?! Don’t get me wrong, I like tito. He’s very nice, does household chores, knows how to sing, a gentleman, has a sense of humor and all that. He might not be as goodlooking as the lieutenant guy but he wasn’t plain or ugly or anything, I actually find him goodlooking too. That made me wonder, if tito was already good looking and he still didn’t compare to the lieutenant’s looks… boy! That lieutenant must be really that hot! I wonder if he has a son now, lol.

Anyway, back to the story…

Later on, the lieutenant left for a mission. When he came back, tita was already married and pregnant with her first child. He was devastated. 😦 But he still wasn’t over her and even told her that he was willing to forget everything that happened before. He was willing to forget that she was married and was willing to accept the child as his own. He was willing to do all of this, just to have her, be with her. He loved her that much.

And again, my heart broke for him. 😥

It was like a goddamn movie or book!

I want him to be happy too. Like, if there’s movie one or book one, there’d be a movie 2 or book 2 and this time, it’s his love story that’s going to be written and that he’d finally meet the one he’d spent the rest of his life with.

I’m not the type who believes in fate, destiny or soulmates but after hearing their love story, it just made me want to badly believe in it. That maybe, I could find mine too or that the lieutenant finds his too. Tita has no idea where he is now, and I kept wondering, is he married now? Does he have a son around my age and shares his father’s features and personality? LOL

I kept thinking, the part where you see each other for the first time and everything just clicks and then you’ll have that gut feeling or whatever that… this is the one. Does that mean that person is really your soulmate? Or is it just us overthinking physical attraction or something? Well, for tita’s case, they ended up together and are happily married but it could be a case to case basis, right? There could be thousands of people out there who had experienced what they experienced but didn’t end up together. (I was one of those people. )

I just think that, anyone could be the one. It’s up to us to make that person be the one. I don’t really believe that it’s written in the book of our lives that we’d end up with a specific person, that it was already arranged who we end up with. If that was the case, how about those who ended up being single, divorced and all that? It seemed unfair somehow for some people to have it and others don’t.

That is why I’ve always believed that it’s entirely our decision, choices and actions that dictate what happens. Of course, it’s accompanied by chance or something random. Just like buffet served in a table. From among the dozens of food laid out, it’s always up to us which one to eat, discard etc.

But still, that romantic side of me couldn’t help but get giddy for tita and tito’s love story and be heartbroken for that lieutenant and wish that he’d meet his “soulmate” if there really is such a thing.

Wherever he is, I hope he’s happy. 🙂

And that he has a son just like him and that I’d be able to meet him and he’d fall head over heels in love with me too, nyaha! 😀

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7 thoughts on “Do you believe in soulmates?

  1. Pingback: ‘Friday’ links! | solosingaporean

  2. Hi! It’s been a while and I’m glad you’re back.
    You’ve got a good topic here that also tells of an interesting story about your tita’s romantic history.
    I do believe in soulmates but the chances of finding that one person among a population of 7 billion are almost nil. So your deduction that it’s up to us to designate a specific person to be “The one” makes a lot of sense. You just have to make sure the chosen one fits the bill of Mr./Ms. Right.

    But a young lady like you is in no rush which means you’ve plenty of time to look around, play the field and have tons of fun. In the process, I hope you’ll be able to meet the special guy who’s destined to be your soulmate.

  3. I’m glad to be back too! It’s been so looong. 😀

    Well, that’s the hard part, having to choose which one becomes the right one and how to make them “the one”. Plus there’s this thing, we set certain standards about our ideal person and end up not following them, haha! I just hope that whoever that person is, he’d be just like my dad and tito combined. I know that setting standards like this can lead to disappointment or false expectations but I just can’t help wishing for it.

    Yes, I guess I’ll just enjoy life and go with the flow. 🙂

    • When it’s time to settle down and choose the person you’ll be spending the rest of your life with, you just got to stick with your standards. And if I may add, raise the bar higher. The problem with most women today is they settle for so much less. I do hope you won’t make the same mistakes I made.
      But of course for now, simply go with the flow and have the time of your life.

      • I think that’s the problem, I feel like my expectations are a bit high and so I don’t get interested easily or something along those lines.

        I wouldn’t exactly call it a mistake, maybe an “experience”. Even if that experience wasn’t as good, you still got a wonderful son because of it. 🙂

  4. Well I don’t know about soul mates but I know that my better half and I are extremely lucky. Our relationship just clicks and I feel lucky to have found the “right” person after a few duds. You just know when it is right. I don’t think words can describe it, but I do believe you can’t force it. I do hope the other guy is happy now and found a person who feels the same.

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